The Situation of Being a Good Friend

Shocking Revelation: Honesty might just be the best policy.
The Story:  A few months ago (like in May) I was crushing hard on one of my better guy friends(I had previously had a relationship with him a couple of years ago), but the fear of rejection stood in my way of revealing my feelings. Feeling out of his league, I sat my self down on the bench of cowardice where I was able to admire from a distance. I made the mistake of biding my time until someone else came along with a bigger pair of balls than I. That person just so happened to be one of my best friends (no one from my school). Being the amazing friend that I am, I took a step aside and told her I was cool with it. Truth was, I was anything but cool with it. And satirically enough I was the person she came to for advice on the flirtationship that arose from the two. Call me Oprah. While I am texting my mom and the occasional loser that tries to hangout with me -(in this sentence I am talking about the guys I talk to, not my friend)-, she is talking to that guy. That guy who is sweet, that guy who is caring, that guy who I f-ing liked first.
I guess my predicament is no ones fault except my own, if I had not been such a p*ssy maybe things would've worked out differently. Being a slave to my own internal devices was a mega problem. I need to bust free of the hold my fear of rejection places on me and actually take a chance with life.

PS_This has nothing to do with any of my 'friends' at my school, and by the way If you would assume I was hating on you before asking me about it than you obviously weren't much of a friend in the first place. And thanks for the unnecessary drama, you made me lose two friends but gain about two hundred page views,

Extra!! Extra!!!

Sorry Dollz, I forgot to mention the latest Hollywood updates!!! TomKat is no longer!! Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes are divorcing. Annd Adele is eating for two. She has a bun in the oven with her long time boyfriend. :) Lots happening in Hollywood these days1

Alphebetical Truths

‎Alphabetical confessions in blog form? Why not.


[A]vailable: Always... Being single is apparently my curse.
[B]irthday: October 3rd, since 1995 :)
[C]rush: Beau Mirchoff, He's been burnin' my beans for awhile now.
[D]rink I last had: Pepsi (fountain, the best way to have it)
[E]asiest person to talk to: My self... what? I'm always around.
[F]avorite song: We Are Young by Fun.
[G]rade I hate the most: Fifth Grade. It was just awkward and I wore ugh boots with leggings. That should sum it up for you. Oh and those nifty pants that could zip off into capris or shorts. Yeah, I had two pairs...
[H]ometown: Roseburg, BumF*ckNowhere Oregon.
[I]'m in love with: Awkward.[J]ealous of: All those b*tches with boyfriends.
[K]illed someone: I wish.[L]ongest relationship: Brodie. Like ten months. In the eighth grade so I don't know if that even counts.
[M]eanest person in school: She graduated!! So I don't know now!
[N]umber of siblings: One. And that's one too many.
[O]ne wish: I could be Jenna Hamilton from Awkward. I would have cool parents and two adorable guys fawning over me.
[P]erson u last called gay: I can't remember because it was so long ago. I consider that really offensive now and know that it is a word that can hurt a lot of people. 
[Q]uestion your always asked: Do you act like this all the time?
[R]eason to smile: My own jokes. It's not my fault I'm F-ing hilarious.
[S]ong I sung last: Somebody That I Used To Know. Very poorly.
[T]ime I woke up: Like noon.
[U]nwanted by: Lots of people.
[V]ery best friend: Thats too hard. I have lots of friends.
[W]orst habit: Digitizing my every move ;)
[X]-ray last had for: Spine
[Y]our last time u cried: Watching Awkward. two days ago. The dpi where Jenna chose Jake :( Still gets me...
[Z]odiac sign: Libra

Top Ten of the Week

Just a fore warning, this Top Ten might be a little bias because of the affinity I'm having for Awkward. at the moment.

10) PedoPhiles of the Facebook variety:  My account on Facebook was set up so you could still message me without being my friend. That quickly changed once this creeper started messaging me a couple hours ago. But don't worry! PedoBear has been blocked and reported. It's a bit hard to pull off saying you are 17 with a profile pic that suggests otherwise (cough cough). Creepahh!

9) After starting my job, I have realized that I had not touched a variety of substances in my life, also realized I do not want to. Food feels disgusting when it's all mixed together in the bottom of a sink. It's like touching puke without the bodily fluids.

8) Big Feet=Big Problems:  Ranging from a 9.5- an 11 is great challenge nowadays because larger sized shows are harder to come by. Seriously Macy's, how much business do you think you are going to get only having up to size nine. I know at least a third of my friends have my size or larger feet.

7) Weather: I'm not gonna b*tch about Oregon's weather because thats what everyone else is doing right now (when have I ever gone with the crowd). I'm gonna take a moment out of my day and just be thankful it's not snowing. I'm down with the rainin. Just tired of the complainin. Get used to it. or get a poncho.

6) The Fourth: Fireworks and BBQ!! I think I might skip the whole rodeo situation this year. I've went the last two years and it was nothing but boy drama. Being tired of the losers and other cretins that roam the rodeo grounds, is probably a good thing for this girl. Hey, I enjoy being single. I'm waiting for my Matty.

5) Magnetic Nail Polish: Really Coool!!! It's this polish that you paint on and then hold this magnet over for ten seconds and it creates these really trippy waves of color.

4) This is where I would talk about how excited I am for Magic Mike. But I've been going off about it for the past year so I'm pretty sure everyone is already tired of my male stripper babble. But YUM.

3) Clear Hair Products: I can't stop smelling my hair. It smells beyond fantastic to the ninth degree. Really floral not too creamy like most shampee+conditioner sets are these days. and OMG the smell has lasted all day long.

2) Matty McKibben: Played by Beau Mirchoff, he is perfection in human form.  My favorite scene from him tonight was when he was asking for another chance with Jenna. I'm in love. His eyes show so much emotion, sometimes they are what does his acting for him. His smile has the ability to knock you off your feet. Amazing.

1) AWKWARD.  : Really? I bet you never would've guessed ;). I feel like I'm watching an episode of my life every time I watch the show.  Everything is just so real and the characters are three dimensional. The plot has substance. If I could be the one to hand out the Emmy's, Awkward would get like fifty-thousand of them. I'm obsessed and I know you are tired of hearing it but thats the way it is.

Rubbed Raw and Reeling

You may've noticed the title to this entry is the same title used in the pilot episode on Awkward. in Jenna's blog. There was a little thought put behind my title choice for tonight. The season premiere of the beloved show did just that, rubbed me raw and left me reeling.
Frustrated as I am, with Jenna's choice and the outcome of last seasons cliffhanger, I still love the show. What can I say? It cracked my hard candy shell and has me oozing with sticky sweet love.
Events you need to be aware of before watching this new epi:

• Jenna's mom wrote the carefrontation letter (or so we all think based on solid evidence) 
• She chose Jake over Matty at the formal. I'm gonna pulla Tamara and go ahead and Ugly Cry on this one. :.....(
• Outside of the show, Molly Tarlov (ArchNem Sadie) has lost the weight. Great. Now she'll probably just get worse.
• Lissa forgave Jenna and is now trying to be her friend.
• Matty is still irrevocably in love with Jenna. Still Ugly Crying!!! I Love You Matty!!!!

The Object of My Affection

SPOILER ALERT: DON'T READ ANY FURTHER IF YOU DON' WANNA KNOW THE DIRTY DEETS!!!

The pluses and the minuses of the episode, "Resolutions", is directly related to how you feel about the show. If you are Team Matty than you will be just as bummed after the show as I am. On the other hand, if blondie is more your style, than you are probably in love with the show right now.

What to look forward to:

• Jake finding out that Matty was the one to give Jenna the Hymen Hammer.
• Uh-Oh!!! The Sanctuary had a security camera up the whole time!! Lots of juice was caught on tape. ;) Maybe some Matty Jenna action too.
• Jenna going to Church camp!!! Haha OMG!!
• And hopefully Matty making an uber bold move to win back Jenna's heart. I'm thinking he should go Heath Ledger status from Ten Things I Hate About You. Marching band, PA system, corny love song, the whole shebang. 

As much as I hate the fact that Jenna chose Jake, I'm still waiting in anticipation for next weeks episode. I'm reeling for more of my Matty. There is no way around loving this show. Jenna is my inspiration to take control of my life and to do things the way I want them to be done. Be bold and make people look, not for the bad but show them that you can exceed their expectations while being who you are. She is the reason I am writing this now. I can't stress this enough!! If you haven't watched this show, head on one to MTV.com and catch an episode or two, you won't regret it, you will be hooked.

Lovely Midday Ramblings

Cold Showers in the Middle of Summer

The title to this entry is relevant in two ways.  It poured down like an SOB today in the middle of june, being one. And two, I just took a cold shower using my new shampoo and it really made me think. My shower tends to be the place where all life or death decisions seem to be made in case you were unaware.
After watching a double marathon of Awkward, my inner monologue started going insane with pervasive thoughts of the future.Where am I gonna be in five years? Who's gonna be with me when I'm there? Really deep stuff.
Since obvi my first choice would've either been me as a vampire (looking' hot) next to my vampire soul mate or married to a billionaire oil tycoon living somewhere in the caribbean. Neither of those choices is very realistic. That makes me sad that I have no idea what my future beholds but I guess thats the way its supposed to be.
If in five years I am in Portland finishing up my bachelors degree in Graphic Design with a small apartment above the city, then I will be incredibly happy :)

If you don't like help, don't ask for it.

Being a good friend is sometimes not what some people need.  I have this one friend who refuses to listen to the voice of reason and instead goes around doing the things that she says she doesn't want to be doing. As soon as she gets done partying or being with this guy, she feels like crap and comes balling to me, saying sh*t like how she doesn't have any good friends and doesn't want people to use her any more. Since I'm trying to be a good friend, I'll tell her that she's better than that and that she does have lots of good friends. Truth is I'm lying. It's nobody's fault but your own sweetheart. You cause all this drama and you decide to hang out with the losers who sleep with your boyfriend. Something does not add up. If you want YOUR life to change than YOU have to be the one to change it. Sorry but thats the truth. If you don't like it keep lying to yourself, it will just hurt you more.

The Summer Line Up- The Must Have's for your DVR

If you are one of those people who watch a lot of shows during the regular season for Prime time and you are bored out of your wits, not to fear, DirtyDolla is here.  Lots of great programs come on during the summer, you just have to know where to find them.

MTV: They bring us a majority of High School style entertainment throughout the hot three months. Usually one or two of every Variety.

Fantasy Pick: Teen Wolf.

Yummy Teen Wolf

   I am a huge fan of Teen Wolf for a variety of reasons. One being the story line, it's catchy and easy to get into. And two, the mega delish cast. Tyler Hoechlin (uber drool worthy) plays Derek, the BA alpha wolf. I'd join his pack any day. I would give it a four out of five.

Reality Show: Jersey Shore, Snooki and JWoww, and Teen Mom.
Jersey Shore: Unrealistic partying? If that and the drama floats your boat then more power to you.
3/5 stars.

Snooki and JWoww: With the spotlight on Snooks due to here baby drama, this might be the one to watch. Well maybe for the first two episodes. But sorry this doesn't out rank the Duo's original show.
3/5 stars.

Teen Mom: If you, like myself, enjoy laughing at incredibly stupid people for an hour a week OMG you need to watch this show. Only one of the Mom's is not class A stupid. The rest you want to hit in the head with an overly large skillet. Points for the entertainment but it doesn't really send out any type of positive message except: Don't get knocked up and look like these dumb hoes. But the message kinda gets washed away once you find out how much those girls make per episode. Ridiculous.
2/5 stars.

Jenna

RomComDram: Awkward.: The best show I have ever watched in the history of my life. I feel like the show is my life. You want to punch the main character in the face sometimes for the decisions she makes, but you know you would've done the same thing. The characters act like real people.  It's not a show that portrays the life of rich city kids. For me, the show was love at first sight and I will love it forever and I hope it stays on the air for years to come. If they cancel it my heart will break.
Perfect score: Five out of five stars!!!!

ABC Family: This is a confusing little network, the channel says family but the shows are for anything but.

Mystery:  Pretty Little Liars: The one good show on ABC Family. It is very mysterious and has lots of drama and cute boys, but if you miss a couple of episodes its hard to get back in the PPL groove.




Teen: Secret Life of an American Teenager: Sorry, but I don't know any American teenager who does all that stuff. This show is sooooo inappropriate, I could never watch it around adults without blushing.

Annoying Amy from Secret Life

Awkward is on in less than a week!!

Matty McKibben I Love You 

Yee-Haw Awkwardians! We have almost made it to Season Two!!! From what I've heard Matty is still very much in the picture so all you Team Matty's (like my self), we will not have to mope through the entire season, just when Jake is in the picture. I hate that Jenna chose Jake so much!!! I hate hate hate it. I don't think I've ever been so mad at Jenna in my entire life!

T-Minus 8 Days and Counting

MAGIC MIKE

Guide to blowing people off

Guide to blowing people off brought to you by yours truly.
In my time, I have had many of my "friends" blow me off, using dumb excuses or I catch them in their lie. So I have decided to help you, my readers, in the art of blowing people off.

By following five simple steps, I can help you avoid detection. And you will never have to hang out with losers again.

Step One: Make your excuse worthy, weddings, funerals, doctors appointments, and trips with the parents are all sure fire excuses.

Step Two: Always break it to them over the phone, sound sincere, apologize, give two to three details and hang the phone up. Don't drag it out, they will just ask more questions.

Step Three: Don't cross paths!! The biggest mistake a person could make, is going to a place where the person you are bailing on might be. Staying home or going out of town is your best options.

Step Four: Do not post pics or status updates on Facebook about what you are actually doing, if you do this, I am sorry there isn't any hope for you. You are a moron. Don't even bother reading the last step.

Step Five: Upon seeing the person again, apologize again and offer to try for another time. Don't set anything up, just say another time.

If the guide doesn't work for you, the person you are trying to fool must be a mindreader or you are trying it on me. That doesn't work either. Dirty Dolla knows whats up.

arrt

I-pod blues :/

What I need, an I-pod. My old four gig just filled up finally after 6 years of use and switching up my music library, time to upgrade. I think it would be really cool if I had the watch thing and wore it around all day as a watch. Ya, know?


Nike iPod nano 8G 6th generation - Graphite, ONE SIZENike iPod nano 8G 6th generation - Graphite, ONE SIZENike iPod nano 8G 6th generation - Graphite, ONE SIZE

My Newest Obsession

I have discovered a whole new world in which I can bury myself with in. X-Men. I know it's old but my parents have completely different tastes in movies than I do. My mom is a person who judges books by their cover and finds things wrong with every little thing (very annoying). I am the kind of person that looks for more information when I'm watching a movie. My favorite part of the movie is not the action sequences or the climax, but it's the intimate dialogue throughout the movie. The dialogue is where you really get to know the characters.  After watching Xmen first class and X1 and X2, I do believe First Class is by far my favorite of all. In the original Xmen's Proffesior X and Magneto are just the mysterious pillars of the good and the bad sides. First Class puts you right up in their face and makes you relate to them. I really connected to Magneto. I have no idea why, Michael Fassbender must just be an amazing actor. (not to mention hawwwt). The whole move just fell perfectly for me. LOVED IT.

Segment: Mad Editting Skills ;)

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if you like funny check out LULZ TRUCK. Funny stuff on that site. Everything from Tumblrs, memes, cartoons, to dirty jokes and funny pets.
http://www.lulztruck.com/28436/you-know-its-gonna-happen-sooner-or-later/
Press random :)

I'm a bad kid like my mom and my dad made me.

Sittin here jammin to Lady Gaga. All by my lonesome. I can't think of another way to spend a Monday night, OH yeah thats cuz I don't have a life. Gonna watch me some Teen Wolf, it's recording on DVR as I speak..  ;)  Oh and yeah Tonight it the Night by Outasight is pretty kicking it right now, getting me to head bob and stuff.. Remix, I think so. Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah...... Dancing and typing is pretty damn fun together. My hands smell like lotion... Romantic wish by Victoria's Secret. And this whole speaker system is legit. Saw it at the apple store. Crisp and Clear audio.

Bose SoundLink Wireless Mobile Speaker - SOUNDLINKMOBILE

Camera I WANT!!

Nikon D5100 16.2MP Digital SLR Camera - Body Only - Digital SLR

My new music phase..

Recently my brain has been invade my indy rock... Crazy stuff with some amazing lyrics.  A lot of the musicians in that genre are singer/songwriters, bubbling with talent. One of my favorites is Fun. That guy has a voice. and an awesome band behind him. Fun. sends out some Queen vibes, which I really enjoy. It's kind of refreshing to know that there is hope for the world of music, beyond just talking and cussing and making up words. Rap is "creative" and all, I just prefer something with a little more musical substance, I recommend anything by Fun., Mumford and Sons, The Lumineers, Edward Sharpe, and Lana Del Rey.  If you want to tango with variety try alternative rock. It's great.

Courtesy of The Devils Advocate

YUM.  nut said.

http://www.facebook.com/pages/The-Devils-Advocate/169442099849244

I NEEEEED THISSSS!!!

Probably why my friends don't invite me to their house...

Parenting: You are freaking awesome.

Save the lies for someone who loves excuses

Truth.

The face of a new era;)

The One and Only

Bad Friends aren't Friends

Have you ever had a friend that is like a bad drug? A person that pulls you in, excludes you from anyone else and uses you when they want.  I have a class A contender. This person is socially retarded, she says mean things to all of my other friends, but I've been her friend for a while now. I have no idea how to handle the situation. She is all nice and my "Best Friend" until her boyfriend or someone better comes along. She always makes up excuse as to why she can't hang out. It's all total bullish*t. When she's acting like my friend, I have some of the best times, but it's not worth losing all of my other friends that actually like me and are not just using me, Ya know? I can't stand the way she treats my good friends. They don't like her. She doesn't like them. It's always one or the other with her. IDK it's almost like she's completely changed as a person, her values went to sh*t and all she talks about is her boyfriend. UN-FREAKIN-BEARABLE.  I would kick her to the curb but she's like my best friend, I'm used to calling her up and telling her all my secrets. Recently she avoids my calls and only gets in contact if she needs something.  Cutting her out would probably be better for me emotionally but who do I call if I have something I need to talk about? I've known her for so long it would be weird not having her as my best friend, but in truth I haven't been her best friend for a long time. I think I know what I have to do....

I'll dance with my hands above my head.

Someone Do My Nails!!!!! Bah- Jesus

The Purfect Party Nails

A Door A Bell

So Crafty

Avoidance is never the answer..

Sorry for my recent absence Dollz, I've been super busy its not even funny. With in the last month or so, I have completed Drivers Ed, got my license (first try, bitches), got a car, finished 10th grade, and got a job at the local pizza place.  And on top of that, we now have a pretty kick-ass pool and veggie garden.  I am planning to reboot my blogg with full force upon the season premiere of Awkward. complete with a review of the first episode. Maybe even a vlog to boot! Also one of my friends has started a blog on here, Check it out!! http://fantasyisthaareality.blogspot.com/